Frustration

Today was frustrating. I try to be positive about mostly everything, but a lot of things happened at school today that I didn't feel good about.

I feel like my relationship with Mrs. C was really off today - it was almost as if we were viewing two different classes of children. I saw some of our regularly mischevious boys on-task and working hard - she saw them being disruptive and kept them in at recess. I saw Cam poke De in the ribs several times, and when De finally told him to stop, De got yelled at and Mrs. C made him "flip his card" on our behavior chart. Unfair. Just because De acts up a little bit from time to time doesn't mean he is ALWAYS the one in the wrong. I know that Mrs. C can't have eyes everywhere - and everyone makes mistakes - but I hated to see De having such a good day and doing such a good job and then take the rap for someone else's misbehavior. He came in this morning SO happy and focused and ready to learn - and he left this afternoon sad and angry.

Mrs. C graded their math tests from last week - the ENTIRE class (all except for a few exceptional kids) did poorly on one section that, in my opinion, wasn't well explained. They got B's and C's and D's on the test as a result of their inability to tackle this section of the test. If I was a teacher and I gave a test where ONE question or one set of questions presented significant difficulty to the vast majority of my students - I would immediately blame myself and take responsibility for not doing a good job of teaching that section. I'd have just factored out that section and retaught it and put it on the next test. Some of our very bright students were stunned and upset that they got B-'s on their first test. And some of our lower-performing students were even further discouraged by the big red D's and F's they got on their tests. I am so surprised that in FOURTH grade Mrs. C would fail kids on the first test of the year. And she grades in RED! My mother (who taught second grade for YEARS) would be appalled. I thought you are never supposed to grade in red? Purple, green, orange, whatever. Not red.

I guess what I'm really frustrated about today was that Mrs. C and I just weren't on the same wavelength. I feel like I look for (and usually see) the very best in our kids - and she rarely complements them or finds them doing a good job. Her time is spent so much on trying to spot and reprimand bad behavior, that the whole classroom seems to just be so negative. This was evident today more than ever before. I know that she's an experienced and usually awesome teacher, but there were SO many discouraged little faces today, it just broke my heart.

Writing was another area that was suddenly in the spotlight today. Mrs. C made edits on everyone's rough drafts of their Lucy-Caulkins-style "detailed moment" papers. Some of the papers were great, and she edited for grammar and spelling. When I was walking around reading their work and looking at her edits, I noticed several spelling and grammar mistakes in HER work. What do you even say to that? All that aside, this was the moment when I was most upset today (other than seeing De miss recess for Cam's bad behavior)
Ru brings her paper over to me and says: "Miss G, can you help me?"
I read it... Ru had written, "The rollercoaster raced around like a tiger chasing its prey" - and Mrs. C had crossed out "rollercoaster" and written in "The blood in my head." Now Ru's paper (which was an entirely gorgeous work of 9-year-old literary genious) read, "The blood in my head raced around like a tiger chasing its prey"
Ru says: "Miss G, that wasn't what I meant."

WHY would you CHANGE a childs writing like that? I can see helping them with grammar or syntax or sentence structure or spelling or ANYTHING along those lines, but when you CHANGE their BRILLIANT WORDS, I just feel like that's hugely insulting to them as developing writers.

Sorry that this is dragging on - but one more frustrating moment. Ra started crying today, she went back to the corner chair and big tears just started rolling down her face. She wouldn't look at me, she wouldn't talk to me, she wouldn't come out in the hall with me. The kid does great work when she puts her mind to it - she was SO focused this morning, and just had a meltdown this afternoon. She's really smart, and I think that a lot of the time in class she's actually just bored, and thats why she doesnt do her work or makes smart-aleck comments and is a little bratty. Mrs. C goes, "Whatever, she'll be fine" and LAUGHS and goes, "Oh Ra, cheer up, you're fine." I really think this kid has emotional problems... the school counselor has seen her, but its pretty evident in class that she needs more help. I feel like something is really wrong, and I want to help her, but I don't have the knowledge (or the Ph.D.) that is probably necessary. Mrs. C says she doesn't have the time or energy to deal with Ra's mood swings.

Mrs. C does care, but today I just didn't feel like she was seeing the kids the way I was seeing them. Maybe I am missing something, but I left school today just feeling really discouraged.

In better news, I'm doing Mi (though I'm calling him "Matt" for class/research purposes) for my Child Study and he is AWESOME. I watched him a lot today and he just cracks me up. I really like the little guy. He has a funny and sweet sense of humor. And he is a really good reader. He is SO enthusiastic in class - as he reads along with the text in literacy his little eyebrows go up and down and he opens his mouth in surprise when interesting things happen. In math, he raises his hand ALL THE TIME (even though he doesn't always know the answer when Mrs. C calls on him). He told me that he and his older brother share a room and read to each other each night before they go to bed. They take turns reading chapters from Harry Potter. Awesome.

Germy Kids and Professional Development

Well, I've only been in the classroom three weeks and I already have a cold. Germy little fourth graders and their dirty hands and desks and sniffling and sneezing. I'm currently drinking peppermint tea and throwing back Airborne. I think early bedtime is definitely in order tonight.

Today we had our first "Professional Development Day" at M School. The kids got out early (12:00) and we spent the rest of the afternoon in the Library discussing various issues and doing a writing analysis activity. There was also line dancing in the hallway. I kid you not.

Mrs. F, the principal, gave a 30 minute presentation on the importance of learning objectives. There were a lot of grumbles from the teachers... "When am I ever going to find time to write learning objectives? I don't understand why this is necessary. I already teach just fine, I don't need to write objectives." etc. etc. I, however, thought that Mrs. F made some great points in favor of learning objectives, and considering how accomodating and amenable she's been to the faculty, I hope they'll go along with this one. Here were her points: In order to be an effective teacher, learning needs to be "results-oriented." By writing learning objectives, you clearly state where you are going. By having a goal, you can then administer the means to get there, and evaluate when you have arrived.

Earlier this summer we learned the "Teaching for Understanding" framework in our Social Studies Methods class and I really like the way that it is structured. This is along the same lines. Teachers are supposed to write lesson objectives that are specific, observable, measurable, and performance-based in the format of, "You will be able to...." or "Students will be able to...." They avoid verbs that are too vague, unmeasurable, or ambiguous (like appreciate, believe, comprehend, grasp, enjoy, familiarize, learn, like, realize, understand). They are concrete and MEASURABLE. An example: "Students will be able to convert Celsius temperatures to Farenheit." or "Students will be able to identify instances of personification in poetry."

(I know this is pretty typical stuff, but NO ONE at M School is using this format in lesson plans. Mrs. F also wants them to write "higher order questions" but she is leaving that for next PD day. Will be interesting to see how that goes.)

We looked at writing samples in our grade groups (I was with 2, 3, and 4) and talked about strengths and weaknesses and ways to help the kids better develop their writing. This time the focus was specifically on a "movie in your mind" where you take a "watermelon idea" and break it down into a "seed moment" with lots of description, action, thoughts, feelings, etc. The idea is that you take a moment and really streeettcchhh it out. I think that there are a lot of kids in our class who still aren't getting this idea, but Mrs. C brought some good examples with her for PD. One in particular was Ru's... truly amazing work. She did a descriptive and creative story about a rollercoaster ride that was WAY better than anything I could have ever come up with... despite my English major.

In other news, Ra was a real grouch again today. Nothing sweet or nice ever seems to come out of that girl's mouth - all I ever hear are complaints, back-talk, attitude, or just silence. There is really something going on with her - the kid needs counseling, or medication, or something, and its SO hard to give her the attention she obviously needs when there are 20 other kids who also need help. And that's with both Mrs. C and me in the room at the same time! I can see how kids "slip through the cracks" - we do what we can to help her, but it never seems like its enough.

Proud to be an American

Mrs. C assigned a paper with the title, "I'm Proud to Be An American" and asked the students to write a 1 page essay and draw pictures that represent their pride in their country. They were asked to describe all the things they love about America - places, people, foods, freedoms, etc. - in preparation for Sept. 11th and our upcoming social studies unit on foundations of democracy. As I mentioned, we brainstormed ideas in class yesterday, and the papers are due tomorrow. I saw some really great, creative rough drafts today lauding everything from McDonalds and ToysRUs to backyard bbqs with family and Philadelphia's monuments and museums. Some included wiser-than-their-years sentences about freedom of speech, freedom of religion, the right to vote, the right to public education, etc. I was impressed. We also received this letter:

Dear Mrs. C:
How are you? Fine, I hope!
This letter is in response to a project your class is working on about being proud to be an American. I think my son is not old enough to understand what this statement means. My wife and I have always talked to our children about the good and bad of living in America, especially for African Americans. We believe when they are of an appropriate age to really understand this country in which they were born in, then with the right information and knowledge, a question like that can be probably addressed.
I don't agree with this part of his homework assignment. Thank you for your time.
Mr. and Mrs. _______

I wish I could tell this couple that their fourth grade son has better grammar than they do, but that is beside the point. We are assigning the kid an alternate assignment ("I am proud of my family because...", rather than "I am proud to be an American because..."). Mrs. C says that some things (and most parents) just aren't worth fighting. She's probably right - but I still feel frustrated.

In our Social Studies Methods course this summer we discussed the importance of teaching students to participate in democracy - to understand our nation, its system of government, and its history. To appreciate the good, and to work to change the bad. Even in fourth grade kids are capable of thinking critically about current events, government, human rights, and politics - and it seems like Mrs. C expects them to. This is the first of many conversations we will be having about America this year. If we don't embark on that learning journey together, then how are we ever going to fully prepare our youngest Americans for the future?

Mini-conferences

So, this morning Mrs. C decides to let me know that she'll be "gone for a few hours in the afternoon" and hopes that I would be interested in "taking over" for her while she's out. Technically there was also a sub (district policy since I'm not yet licensed), but she sat at Mrs. C's desk and read a romance novel the majority of the time. I think she said a total of 5 words to the kids. I was on my own.

Its only my second day of student teaching -- and, to be honest, I wasn't sure I'd be up to a full afternoon of being in charge of 21 fourth graders. But honestly, at that point, its not like you can say "no." So I went with it. And it turned out great. Everyone was SO well behaved, they were quiet and focused and kind to each other. I was very impressed. We did the second half of our "Whole Language" lesson (Reading responses to a short story), corrected the "Daily Edit," wrote in our journals (in honor of the upcoming September 11th, they were assigned to brainstorm reasons why they are proud to be an American). Then, lunch, recess, and a whole school assembly (good timing). They came back at the end of the day and worked on their "Me-Tees" (designing t-shirts that represent them) while listening to the Star Wars soundtrack.

Here's the part that I was really proud of: While the kids were at lunch, I read through all of their reading responses. I sorted them into two piles - kids who seemed to understand the assignment and fully answered the questions, and those who didn't. While they were working independantly on their "Me-Tees," I had mini-conferences with each kid who had a problem with their reading responses. One by one I called them back to my desk and we went over their responses together. I gave them compliments on the parts I liked, and had them explain to me their thinking on the parts that presented problems for me. We talked about ways to make the responses stronger, and then they revised their responses at the back table and turned them back into me.

I felt like this was really constructive -- the rest of the class was working on an individual project, and I was able to spend some one-on-one time with the kids who had difficulty with earlier work. The majority of their revised responses were great. Much improved. However, even after we talked, neither Ke or Br seemed to really "get" it. I need to find better ways of explaining things to them... it seemed like they got it when we were talking, and then I got their work back, and it was entirely different than I was expecting. They still didn't answer the questions the way they were supposed to, and I'm 100% sure that Ke has no idea what "describe the setting" of the story means. Even so, at the end of the day I felt like the kids who were having trouble were now more comfortable with what we are looking for in their response writing. And that made me feel really good.

First Day

First day of school today... I am too tired to write much, (see above picture) but it was really great. The kids are wonderful, and I was so happy to be able to put faces to the names I've written over and over on workbooks, nametags, stickers, etc.

A few of today's moments:

1.) My class is SO diverse. My kids are black, white, asian, middle-eastern, hispanic, and whatever else. In fairly equal proportions. I've never seen anything like it. Two of the boys, Ze and Mo, are fasting for Ramadan. After explaining to Mrs. C and I why they didn't want to participate in snacktime (yes, even in fourth grade), they volunteered to tell the class about what the holiday means to their families and their faith. Talk about a teachable moment. The rest of the class seems to be mostly Jewish and Christian - and they were SUPER interested in learning about another faith tradition.

2.) El loves Led Zepplin. Seriously. She can name songs, band members, and concert dates. She is also a math whiz and a reading superstar... and when she finishes her work, she moves right along to helping any other members of her group who are struggling. Awesome.

3.) Ru said today: "I think that new crayons are my favorite thing in the whole world." I told her that they are my favorite thing too!! I think we're going to get along just great. I have never seen anyone as excited about new school supplies. (Other than myself, obviously)

4.) Ra started crying today around noon today because she was so hungry (our lunch period is very late -- they don't eat till 1:10pm). She said she didn't get breakfast because her mom left the house at 5:30am and she had to take a taxicab to school this morning. And will have to every morning. She is a little melodramatic, but seems seriously concerned about her mom and the idea of taking a cab every day. Mom told Ra that she's at risk of being fired at work - so Ra has to come to school hungry and worried in a taxi. One of the counselors reminded me that cab fare is cheaper than day care.

5.) De LOVES to write. When Mrs. C asked the class to get out their journals, he let out an audible yelp of happiness and said, "Writing is my favorite subject!" The topic of the day was as follows: "Today is your first day of fourth grade. How are you feeling? What are you thinking?"
Many of the kids wrote a paragraph or two -- De wrote a whole page and a half, with great detail and thought. Here's the issue... just about all of it was spelled wrong and grammatically incorrect. Then I have to consider - is it better to write a perfectly correct paragraph, or a totally incorrect but enthusiastic page and a half? I don't know. I will be interested to see how Mrs. C works with De on his writing this year. I don't want him to lose his enthusiasm.

I am going to bed now. I am exhausted. :)

Teacher Prep Days

Today was my second day of teacher prep - and tomorrow is the first day of school! I am so excited to meet the kids in my class. Mrs. C, my "classroom mentor" (PennSpeak for "teacher") has been so kind and welcoming! She has really made me feel that I am part of the team. My name is up next to hers on the wall outside our room, I have my own desk with cute desk supplies, post-its, etc., and she had me draft a note introducing myself to our kids' families to go home in the packet with everything else tomorrow. I know its going to be a great year.

I have already begun to hear snippits of information about our incoming class from the 3rd grade teachers - both good and bad news. The one little boy with whom we were expecting to have the most difficulty has transferred to Catholic school, and I got to meet one girl, S, today with her dad. She just moved to the neighborhood and seemed very nice (and also nervous and quiet, but who wouldnt be!). I'm really excited to meet everyone tomorrow. I've printed their names so many times on folders, workbooks, bookmarks, handouts, nametags, etc. that I feel like I know them already!

Mrs. C seems like a GREAT teacher. She uses the Lucy Calkins writing method and the Everyday Math curriculum, both of which we are studying in class at Penn this semester. She is also REALLY into science - the class raises silkworms, crawfish, beetles, and other animals throughout the year. This is really exciting. We looked at her lesson plans for the next few weeks, and talked about her methods for evaluating the students at the beginning of the year. I am happy to know that I am learning from someone with so much experience and enthusiasm for the profession.

I'm watching Project Runway with M tonight... yay! I didn't watch last week's episode, so I have TWO to catch up on. And it will give us plenty of time to compare notes and get ready for THE BIG DAY tomorrow!

Great stuff

"Caring is a prerequisite to achievement.
Promoting achievement is the ultimate form of caring."

Quoted from TMAO remarking on Dan Meyer's education blog -- two lines that really sum up how I feel about urban education at this point. There is nothing more important in the classroom than giving students the tools to succeed academically and personally in life. Yes, urban kids face unbelievable obstacles, but none of these obstacles are insurmountable. And because the kids in Anacostia have half the advantages of the kids living in Georgetown, our schools should be helping them twice as much. Caring about these kids means making high expectations and high achievement the number one priority.

Michelle Rhee

I have been meaning to write about my love for Michelle Rhee for a while now, and after coming across this video interview with Charlie Rose, I couldn't help but take this opportunity to gush. (Dan Meyer recently refered to his own warm fuzzy feelings for Chancellor Rhee as an Educrush, which I think is adorable.) I have lots of "Educrushes" these days, the more education books and blogs I read, the more I find myself falling in love with other people's ideas and philosophies on teaching. It has definitely been inspiring me to think about the kind of educator I want to be.

Here's the video: http://www.charlierose.com/shows/2008/07/14/2/a-conversation-with-michelle-rhee-chancellor-of-the-district-of-columbia-public-schools

I love her passion for accountablity, I love her no-nonsense, no-excuses approach to education. She seems to truly believe that every teacher should be a great teacher, and she is committed to making it lucrative and possible for extraordinary people to become teachers and succeed as teachers. The woman is not willing to settle for mediocrity, and she's shaking things up in DC education. And I love it. The city needs it.

There are so many factors that affect children's ability to learn, particularly in under-served, inner-city neighborhoods, but blaming all of those factors for a child's inability to read and write is unacceptable. They may not come to school as well prepared as children in other parts of the city, but if we use that as an excuse for why so few are testing at proficiency, then it lets us, as educators, off the hook. We may not be able to fix all of the social and economic problems in the city's worst neighborhoods -- but those problems are not an insurmountable obstacle in the education of the children who live there. Michelle Rhee, in her interview, notes that "education is supposed to be the great equalizer" and at this point it obviously isn't, but it SHOULD be.

Rhee's "red track" and "green track" concept for the teachers union contract is, in my opinion, brilliant. I would without a doubt choose, and be excited by, the opportunity to be evaluated each year (through standardized test scores, interviews, or whatever means necessary) and paid based on my performance as a teacher. I can understand the senority and tenure concerns of older, more experienced teachers, and I am glad that Rhee is giving them the option of staying on that path through the "red track." However, if my students did not learn in my class, then I know I did not do a good job as their teacher, and I take responsibility for their failures. I'm not afraid of being accountable for my work.

Vacation!

So, I know I have been horrible about posting, but I promise once the school year starts I will get better about it. There will be much more to say when I'm in the classroom with 30 4th graders all day. (Yes, I've again switched grades. Same school, but now I'm w the 4th grade class at M School. I LOVED 4th grade, so I'm excited)

As of now, I am on VACATION! Yay!! Summer session is over, I never have to look at either of my final papers again, and I have two weeks off to enjoy time in DC with John and go home to California to see the fam. Hooray!

In filling out the course evaluations for my very short, but action packed, summer session at Penn, I reflected a bit on the summer, and I feel like I really learned a lot. Although I am sick of talking about the "funds of knowledge" in my neighborhood, I really am sold on the idea of teaching through the "Teaching for Understanding" framework advocated in our Social Studies methods class. I really enjoyed designing my three week curriculum on immigration, and I feel like I learned a lot in the process - I'm also hoping that its something I can use in the spring when I'm in the classroom full time!

I stopped at the Penn bookstore's education section to pick up some summer reading for the next two weeks, and in case you're interested, here's what I got:

1. Lies My Teacher Told Me, by James Loewen... we read a chapter of this in Social Studies Methods and I thought it was pretty cool - it has definitely been changing the way I want to teach history.
2. Letters to a Young Teacher, by Jonathan Kozol... after reading "Shame of the Nation" and "Savage Inequalities," I had to have Kozol's new book. It looks like he wrote it just for me!
3. City Kids, City Schools...a new compilation of essays on urban education by lots of awesome people - Lisa Delpit, Michael Eric Dyson, Gloria Ladson-Billings, Pedro Noguera, etc.
4. Holler If You Hear Me, by Gregory Michie... one chapter of this was assigned in my course packet for my School and Society class, and I loved it, so, I picked up the rest of the book.

and two non-education books:
5. Run, by Ann Patchett... "Bel Canto," one of her other books, is one of my favorite books of all time, so I of course had to buy her new book.
6. The Road, by Cormac McCarthy... Pulitzer Prize winner, and I read a great review of this one in the NYTimes. Plus, I figure I should read something other than education books on vacation. :)

My School!

(Note: I am blogging from my tech class at Penn GSE -- as an assignment! Wow!)

We took tours of our schools and neighborhoods today. I'm assigned to M School, and I'll be teaching 3rd grade. It seems like a really great community!

Although walking around for three hours in the heat was pretty exhausting, we saw a lot of the area and our tour guide (also a teacher at the school!) was really well informed and interesting. She's been living in the neighborhood for 30 years, raised her kids there, etc. Really knows the neighborhood. It seems like a very diverse area, with some beautiful buildings, great parks, etc. The school is really well funded and well supported, the parents are very involved, and it seems like a wonderful learning community.

I was expecting to be in a school thats is far more underserved than M.... there are lots of great resources, computers, art classes, a newly renovated library and science lab, etc. I'm not entirely sure how I feel about this...